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Which principles apply (3)

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-20-07 16:34

Version 2 has exceeded the desired limit of posts.

Folks, please make your suggestions, comments, contributions in this new thread.

J ~

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NAMESAKE - a 2006 movie

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-22-07 10:17

This is about an Indian family. The dad, an academic, goes back to India to choose a bride the traditional way. She comes to New York and begins to adjust to American life.

In America, they have a son named GOGOL and a daughter named SONIA.

The movie called 'Namesake' is around the name GOGOL.

The son GOGOL, after visiting the Taj Mahal, is inspired to become an architect. He becomes a successful architect and has an American girlfriend with whom Gogol is very much in love. Gogol, to all appearances, is totally Americanized.

The dad goes takes a job at another university and goes there alone because the wife does not want to adjust to a new community as she is accustomed to her daily routine. Suddenly the dad takes ill, calls his wife from the hospital and says he will be alright. Unfortunately, he dies suddenly in the hospital, alone.

GOGOL is shocked by his father's sudden death. He realizes how deeply Indian he is despite his American girlfriend (who cannot cross this bridge into his Indian psyche) and his American success. He visits his father's apartment and collapses on the bed, weeping. He goes to India to observe traditional grieving rituals....

_________

Everything you fathers have done for your children will, one day, be appreciated. Your influence is far deeper than it appears.

My wish is that the light of understanding and maturity dawns whilst you are here in this chapter of life as it certainly does is many situations. As I have said before, 3rd party people have a subtle role to play in aiding / bridging understanding.

My own case is that I have a budding relationship of trust w my children.
This will continue to grow.

At the same time, my view of life is that we have eternal life. What doesn't get finished in my earthly life, gets finished later on. We all live this life, then go on to eternal life. We have to wait for the heart to open. My giant peonies only bloom in April-May. Nothing makes them bloom earlier.

Good wishes to the parents of AW forum.

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Re: NAMESAKE - a 2006 movie

Author: platypus
Date: 11-22-07 11:29

Joy, you really know a lot about the hurt and confusion that a parent has to go through. You spoke directly to my heart.

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Re: NAMESAKE - a 2006 movie

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-22-07 12:42

My dear Platypus,

If I were in your environment, I would buy a copy of the movie NAMESAKE and give it to your kidlets....this is what 3rd party people can do.

It is obvious how much you (and others here) love your children. So obvious. The children are ob-liv-ious.

Hmm...maybe I should deliver a knuckle sandwich :-) 3rd party people have more leeway than parents.

_________

In the first post about NAMESAKE, I meant to say that when Gogol went to his father's BARREN apartment he fell on his father's bed weeping, crying out loud, "I am so sorry," his tears and cries falling face down into the pillow.

By "barren", I mean his father's apartment was barren of human warmth and the touch of a loving family...it was apparent to the viewing audience simultaneously that it was apparent to Gogol, who was visiting it for the first time when his father had died - barreness. It pierced his soul starkly.

Interestingly, the current pop phenomenon, 14 yr old Miley Cyrus aka Hannah Montana ( a Disney character) , has a very close relationship w her father a musician, Billy Ray Cyrus, in real life. (hope I got the name right). Any American with a daughter age 8-14 will know who Hannah Montana is. The fictional character Hannah Montana is real life Miley Cyrus dressed in a blonde wig. Her image is now on bed spreads and every piece of merchandise imaginable.

Meanwhile, Platypus, I am with you and all parents who yearn for their children's understanding.

Those trips to Yellowstone ( the river, metal bridge and Comfort Inn on the hillside by the river) and so on are not lost. They are encoded in memory cells. One day, I am certain you will feel the warmth of their appreciation and understanding. Every thought has been about THEM!

I met a woman in Seattle whose father charged her rent from the time she was about ten or twelve! Kids who have it good, do not know it.

Joy

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My lawyer friend used to say...

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-22-07 13:02

Life is sweet when you DO justice and RECEIVE justice...

(Ain't much fun when it is one way)

Stated another way, life is sweet when you love and are loved in return.

But the opening of a heart cannot be forced.

One has to be patient, swallow one's tears.

The father in the movie NAMESAKE tried to communicate to his son the significance of the name GOGOL and did not succeed. As i recall, it was after his father died that GOGOL understood the significance of his namesake... the reason why he was named GOGOL. It was his own discovery that made it meaningful to him.

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Barbara Walters said..

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-22-07 14:54

"If you want a wonderful little creature to love, get a puppy."

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Re: Which principles apply (3)

Author: coyote
Date: 11-22-07 15:36

I have never fully trusted words. This may seem an odd thing to say for someone who resorts to them a good deal. Words convey meanings. But they can also deceive. They can reveal and distort equally. Words with veneer of reason are particular slippery. Words have a way of keeping our focus narrow to the point that we suffer from a significant loss of peripheral vision. We see details, but we lose the picture. We see a hurt but not the good times. The missed opportunities but not the time together spent. Even words told truthfully to the best of one's ability may end up to mislead, because, simply, words are inadequate, and an over-reliance on them invariably disappoint. A familiar court room tactic: to discredit the testimony of a witness by homing in on a fact or two where he or she might not have been completely truthful. It seems counter-productive to keep reverting the light to the occasional though significant deficit. What good are insights if we are not freed by them. What good are experience if it does not allow us to live with futility. A bigger picture maybe useful in gauging both truth and love.

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Other resources

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-22-07 17:41

There are groups like Landmark Education which offer breakthrough seminars in communication and other life skills.

I met people who had transformational experiences with family, work relationships, marriage.

Therefore, my view that one must have patience, is not the only route.
There are many routes to reaching understanding.

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fire extinguisher

Author: platypus
Date: 11-22-07 19:52

"It was his own discovery that made it meaningful to him."

I do believe that's key. People have to find things out for themselves, and that applies especially to kids growing up.

I no longer recommend anything to my emo teen, be it movies, music, books, newspaper articles, school subjects, colleges to consider attending in the future......nothing at all, when I think of it. I found that my past recommended lists inevitably became her "keep off" list. :-)

So, what to do in that situation? I don't know, really, so for now, I've chosen backing off. I've given myself the role of a fire extinguisher. I'm around, and handy if I'm needed. But most days, I don't do nothing. Talk, yes. Do some simple family activities together, yes. But I don't say anything that could be taken as agenda-laden in even the smallest ways.

How do I feel about all that? Kind of weird, really. But look at it on the bright side. If I think of my teen child as a room mate with her own life and doesn't want to be bothered with a lot, then I'm observing the right equitette. Besides, as I said in the outset, I agree that people just have to make their own discoveries, on their own pace, and on their own terms.

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Re: fire extinguisher

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-23-07 02:56

Wise man. Wise dad.

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Parental training is 'indispensable' as an ascending mortal

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-23-07 05:01

PAPER 45 - THE LOCAL SYSTEM ADMINISTRATION, p 516, Urantia book.

line 147: "No surviving mortal, midwayer, or seraphim may ascend to Paradise, attain the Father, and be mustered into the Corps of the Finality without having passed through that sublime experience of achieving parental relationship to an evolving child of the worlds or some other experience analogous and equivalent thereto. The relationship of child and parent is fundamental to the essential concept of the Universal Father and his universe children. Therefore does such an experience become indispensable to the experiential training of all ascenders. "

_______

It goes on to say that mortals who have not acquired this traning in this life will acquire it in the next worlds.

________

The nephew of my friend's husband is a drug addict. This son told his mother that if she did not pay his drug debts, the drug dealers would come and beat her up. I believe she has changed the locks to her house.

We have much to be thankful for.

In conclusion, being a parent (whether biological or in relationship to parenting others' children ) is part of our training as evolving persons.

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Re: Which principles apply (3)

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-23-07 08:26

Deep subtlety goes over my head, Coyote. I am plain.

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Re: Which principles apply (3)

Author: coyote
Date: 11-23-07 11:32

Plain is Taoist. Very Taoist. That was just some obscure coyote musing; you need not overly trouble yourself with that. Written more for myself than for anyone else. :o)

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Re: Which principles apply (3)

Author: platypus
Date: 11-23-07 11:43

"Written more for myself than for anyone else. :o)"

I recognized that, Coyo. A poet dissastisfied with the medium.

Seriously, yes, words are often miscontrued, even deceiving (intentionally or no). But that is precisely why it's often necessary for people to talk often. If you're not quite sure what the other guy means the first time he said something, usually that becomes clear with clarification and confirmation and so on.

The worst kind of misunderstanding between people that I know of, is that someone utters something that's taken to be really hurtful or offensive, but unintended, and relationships just break off from there. It's just such a waste, because so often things could be mended, if only there's an opportunity for people to clarify. If this involves someone we care about, then for God's sake find a way to set one's pride aside and try to verify just what the other guy meant.

Using words to communicate is like doing arithmatic. When in doubt, or when some large sum is at stake, double check the work!

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Limitation of words

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-23-07 12:37

"Using words to communicate is like doing arithmatic. When in doubt, or when some large sum is at stake, double check the work!"

"If you're not quite sure what the other guy means the first time he said something, usually that becomes clear with clarification and confirmation and so on."

So true, Platypus.

I do recognize the limitation of words in communicating. Knowing a person over a lifetime, or working with someone a long time, seeing their actions and reactions one gets to know the context of their words and we can have some measure of reliability of what the words mean when they use those words.

We are limited in understanding one another fully and can only try our best within these limits - in this case, using words over the internet.

I will say that even living/ working with someone a long time does not presume we know them fully - there is an essential mystery that is perhaps best left unknown and also cannot be known - but we do know them better than occasional correspondents over the internet.

When my son is 60 I will be 86. He will increasingly see things from a different perspective when he is 60.

Take care, Coyote & Platypus.

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Re: Limitation of words

Author: suen.kuen
Date: 11-23-07 20:42

keep your pretty head free of the mundanes.....including human relationship.....come ce come sa.....just live your life to the fullest..and you'll be as pretty as a 16 year old everyday. (That's how I like to picture you when you did your transit in Hong Kong that many years ago reflecting yourself in the lotus pond in HK Botanical Garden.)

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Re: Limitation of words

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-24-07 05:23

Silly Billy Big Tall Suen

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Re: Limitation of words

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-24-07 12:01

Dear Suen,

Coyote, Platypus and I have been discussing the joys of parenthood.

I want to say that from what I have experienced so far:

* Our children love us more than they themselves yet realize. They don't know yet what we mean to them. I pretended to not see or hear the rebuffs.

* The job of teenagers is to differentiate from us. Therefore what we know or offer is automatically rejected. They are doing what teenagers are supposed to do to develope self identity. They have to rebel against parents. This is normal. This is nature.

* Coyote & Platypus will see what responsible people they have raised as children go into twenties upward and are married.

* Parenthood has its ups and downs, grandparenthood is a sweeter place. Despite the fact that my children each married into large , warm families with a surfeit of family and supportive friends, when they each had a baby I was very much included as 'grandmother'. Children desire grandparents for their offspring. My grandchildren have other grandparents, yet I as a grandmother was and have been included and desired at their initiative. I did not know all this would happen when I was a parent. This is how it unfolded.

* Sometimes sons-in-law or daughters-in-law turn out to be nice people. This is a bonus.

FROM - A Mother and Grandmother

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Re: Limitation of words

Author: suen.kuen
Date: 11-25-07 08:55

Joy....you care too much and maybe because of it ,unbeknownst to you, the children felt you were demanding and over authoritative.
I have not experienced any of those growing pains inflicted by the second generation. They all went off early to study abroad and .....never came back...see!! And now all married and settled down abroad.
Be happy....and your familiy will be happy too..is now my motto.

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Re: Limitation of words - Billy and Franklin Graham

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-25-07 20:32

Dear Suen,

Good theory you have there but off the mark. Surviving does not permit authoritarianism because surviving, by definition, is a place of no authority, disempowerment, unbelonging. I am happy now. Life is good. Some people's lives have a different cast from your gayer, lighter, more relaxed perspective (evident throughout yr writing ) - which was delayed in my case, but yes, my wheel has most certainly turned. God is great.

ENCOURAGEMENT FOR FATHERS

Franklin Graham, son of famous preacher Billy Graham, was a teen age rebel. However, Franklin later turned out to be an evangelist with his own ministry and will take over leadership of the Billy Graham ministry.

"....he [Franklin] became a teen rebel who smoked and drank and fought. He led police on high-speed chases and was kicked out of LeTourneau College in Longview, Texas, after his father had used his influence to get him in"

THEIR EXPERIENCES ABOUT SPENDING TIME

Billy Graham was often away when Franklin was growing up. Franklin was often away when his own children were growing up. Franklin has found his grown children now saying they are too busy when he calls them. (The song by Harry Chapin "The Cats in the Cradle" describes this cycle. Lyrics at end of post.)

In the article below, dated July 2002, said that Billy Graham and his son Franklin have lunch once a week together and spend as much time as possible together.

http://www.cleveland.com/religion/index.ssf?/religion/more/070602.html

A NOTE ABOUT RUTH GRAHAM - wife of Billy Graham.

Billy Graham's wife, Ruth who was born in Tsingkiang, China in 1920, passed away in June 2007 at age 87.

"In 1988, thanks to Ruth's efforts, the Grahams went on a 17-day trip through China, where she was greeted as "a daughter of China" and Billy as "a man of peace." Both of them were received by Premier Li Peng."

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2007/juneweb-only/124-43.0.html

_________

Gone fishin' ...enjoy the botanical gardens, Suen :-) Life's good . I am thankful.

Good night to all the fathers.

J~

Cats In The Cradle Lyrics

Artist: Harry Chapin(Buy Harry Chapin CDs)
Album: Cats In The Cradle

My child arrived just the other day
He came to the world in the usual way
But there were planes to catch and bills to pay
He learned to walk while I was away
And he was talkin' 'fore I knew it, and as he grew
He'd say "I'm gonna be like you dad
You know I'm gonna be like you"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home dad?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then

My son turned ten just the other day
He said, "Thanks for the ball, Dad, come on let's play
Can you teach me to throw", I said "Not today
I got a lot to do", he said, "That's ok"
And he walked away but his smile never dimmed
And said, "I'm gonna be like him, yeah
You know I'm gonna be like him"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home son?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then

Well, he came home from college just the other day
So much like a man I just had to say
"Son, I'm proud of you, can you sit for a while?"
He shook his head and said with a smile
"What I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys
See you later, can I have them please?"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home son?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then

I've long since retired, my son's moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said, "I'd like to see you if you don't mind"
He said, "I'd love to, Dad, if I can find the time
You see my new job's a hassle and kids have the flu
But it's sure nice talking to you, Dad
It's been sure nice talking to you"

And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me
He'd grown up just like me
My boy was just like me

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home son?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then.

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Re: Limitation of words

Author: platypus
Date: 11-26-07 11:35

Suen, there's much truth in the observations you made about family. If you really care for someone, it's easy to fall into trap of trying to manage their lives for them.......you just wouldn't be able to help it.

To care about someone or something immensely, yet learning to let go of it........is that really possible? Is that not the most fundamental of contradictions? Is reaching that state of mind not the zenith of wisdom?

Anyway, on a more personal note, it's a surpise to me that you could let go of your family members so well. I mean, from your writings on the World Forum and previous forums I've known you from, you've always come across as someone passionate about his views, and that's not a sign of someone ready to let go.

It's just an observation, although, I also think you have a really big heart.......I really do.

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Re: Limitation of words

Author: platypus
Date: 11-26-07 11:40

I have never learned to let go of something. or someone, without caring less for that someone or something......at least, when I try to let go, I try to get that something or someone out of my mind, or at least try to think of it less.......

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Clarity

Author: mr. liao
Date: 11-27-07 06:26

If anyone has means by which intellectual clarity can be infused into ethical and personal decisions, please let me know.

Words and figures, carefully used, are the most powerful weapons against obscurity.

But they are damaging in the hands of the clumsy, confusing first and foremost, their inept users.

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Recognition

Author: mr. liao
Date: 11-27-07 08:58

Once we recognise that none of us has free will, yet each of us loves, and hurts, communicates, feels and reasons according to predetermined patterns, perhaps we will be more willing to accept each other, forgive and excuse, and if necessary, exact punishments as may be necessary to satisfy our impulse for vengeance - for the sole reason that our happiness depends on the suffering of the transgressor. Could it have been otherwise? Let each man act as his highest lights and his happiness dictate.

None of is truly free, and it is the recognition of this that provides the ultimate satisfaction to the intelligent soul. Could your mother have chosen to act otherwise - given the historical circumstances that shaped her psyche? Could your daughter have chosen to feel otherwise? We are all shaped by forces beyond our control.

We do not choose how we choose. And if we choose to choose how we choose, then how did we choose to choose what we chose to choose?

Free will is an eidolon - a mirage, something that recedes farther into the horizon of impossibility the closer we attempt to approach it.

Slippery, it eludes our grasp. There is no true exercise of the Will that was not already predetermined by conditions beyond the direct influence of that self-same Will. It can be argued that only God has free will. To the extent we cannot determine our Natures, we cannot have free will. What being could be so unconstrained by physical, deterministic laws, save the Divine?

We are but a medley of disparate impulses and thoughts, each forming according to patterns beyond our ultimate control. Each instance of deliberate will presupposes an awareness and a preference already determined outside the exertion of our free will. Free acts are therefore not really free.

We are free, yet not free. This is life's most tremendous paradox. Our awareness of each moment occurs only after that moment has transpired. You cannot really perceive the NOW - by the time your neurons form a representation of that state of events, it has already passed. Our consciousness plays catch-up with reality, and our choices were already made before we were aware of them.

Who could have truly chosen anything than what he has already chosen? And who can change the choices he will make in the future?

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Re: Limitation of words - Billy and Franklin Graham

Author: suen.kuen
Date: 11-28-07 07:54

Joy/Plat: my big heart or not, that song is choking me up. My life has been one big......No Time!
And now I can only tell my kids that whenever they like to come home,I will make their rooms the same as when they left ,with their same beds..desks and what they left.
Rest of the time whenever they call and even don't have time to talk with me after their long sessions (during which I always got asked questions) with their mom....I am already happy!...
Gee....one of these days I'm gonna come over to Canada and come fishing with you at Victoria ferry's pier.
Not easy, Plat , to let go......but I don't let the kids know .

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Re: Recognition

Author: coyote
Date: 11-28-07 12:29

Liao. Pardon me for being bold... Toss it right to the garbage if what I am about to write does not suit you, but don't be mad at your old friend. What we write is often a reflection of our circumstances. Are you feeling less than free, these days? It is fun to bandy words like free will and determinism about. It stimulates the brain. But in the Chinese tradition, such word play has little or no value. Even if we do play, we recognize that for the game that it is. Maybe why illusions + awakening is a major theme that runs through our philosophies? If you feel not free, you may try to reason (rationalize) away that feeling or you might do something about that feeling of no-freedom. It is a feeling. It can be addressed. Circumstances maybe changed to a significant degree...

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Re: Limitation of words - Billy and Franklin Graham

Author: coyote
Date: 11-28-07 12:31

Wow. Quite a good post there buddy. Explains why, kinda, why I have always liked you. Plat is right: big heart. What can I say. Platypus is always quicker on the uptake than me. :o) Yes, you are that, Suen. You do us fathers proud.

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Re: Limitation of words - Billy and Franklin Graham

Author: suen.kuen
Date: 11-28-07 21:32

I am awkward with flatteries in real person....I go tucking on my shirtsleeves...legs crossed inwards and all those things happen on me.
But on cyberboard.....I'd tell you I'm doing somersaultung with that compliment from you......simply elated!

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Cat's in the Cradle

Author: Tom Bombadil
Date: 11-29-07 07:08

Thank you for the title to this song, Joy. Although I know a good part of the song I have never remembered the title to the lyrics. Every time I listen to the simple yet heart wrenching "I don't know when....." I always wonder how many dads are out there listening and regretting.........and from the responses you get, it seems that there are quite a few, albeit with varying degrees and perhaps for different reasons. A peek into the future might reveal, as you have pointed out, that the kids will view each wrong and regret with different eyes at different stages of their lives - as they progress from 18 to 28 to 38 and so on...... just as parents will do the same as they progress from 38 to 48 to 58 ......... which adds a very credible weight to the phrase "older and wiser."

And to platypus, suen.kuen , coyote and all those wise and patient fathers out there - I drink a toast!

Regards
Tom

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Re: Cat's in the Cradle

Author: Joy Living
Date: 11-30-07 11:55

A toast to the wonderful fathers here, seen and unseen, verbal or silent and fathers who have gone before.

Good fathers are usually good sons too. Good men, all.

Bless them - the boy / the man, the father / the son.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/wwwflickrcomphotosjoyliving

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Re: Cat's in the Cradle

Author: coyote
Date: 12-04-07 05:20

Bad son... young, rebellious, despising their values... I thought I was better, more emancipated, more hip. Then one day, under an overcast sky, I stood at his grave, wordless, tearless, but deeply remorseful, missing his touch, the gentle flow of his speech, the wrinkles on his pajamas...

---

The picture looks both happy and sad, both hopeful and bleak. It can summarize many of our lives.

---

The injustice that we experienced, the anger that we have felt, they marked pauses, not life. They need not define us. Even strained cheeriness and small victories will come to detain us one day. Only those moments of small but sweet sadness endure. They carry us through our lives and kiss us goodbye at the end.

---

Despair not, for you have already received. Did not a holy one say the Kingdom of God is within - as in here and now?

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Season's Greetings

Author: Tom Bombadil
Date: 12-16-07 07:21

To Joy, Jane, Administrator Dr. SL Lee, Mr. Chung Yoon Ngan, & ALL forumites old & new.

A Merry Christmas & A Very Happy New Year!

Thanks for those interesting and insightful posts.

The photos that I have have promised Joy are in http://www.flickr.com/photos/18431283@NOO/

More will follow once I have mastered the art of transferring them from a disc to the computer.

Regards
Tom

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Re: Season's Greetings

Author: coyote
Date: 12-18-07 10:59

Nice pictures, Tom. Real people leading real lives. Look and feel authentic. Thanks again, and a Merry Xmas to you too. BTW your link didn't work. This one should:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/18431283@N00/

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No words

Author: coyote
Date: 12-18-07 11:52

And then there are no more words. No Christmas. No shopping. No visits. No obligations. No mundane traffic. Of course these things are still there but they are suddenly not your concerns, not in that moment as you sit in your chair in a corner. Things just are, as they are. And you are oddly happy and content. Is that how you have come into happiness? Has it crept up upon you like a thief? Will you object? Is this it? you wonder. All your years of discipline/ training/ learning have the cumulative effect of landing you in the chair in a corner happy? Life is good. You have come into a sweet spot. "What are you looking so happy about?" you child wonders as he comes into the room. What will you tell him? How will he begin to understand what took you many decades of life and struggle to arrive at? A sweet spot... where you too have begun to partake in this grand thing call life and do so without expectation or complaint or regret? "You are silly, Dad." You agree. You wonder why they have made you jump through so many hoops to get to your own chair. But it's all good. You give thanks to all your teachers along the way...

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Re: Season's Greetings

Author: Tom Bombadil
Date: 12-19-07 03:51

Why, thank you very much, coyote.

BTW, can you please tell me where I went wrong? I always lose my way (somehow) when it comes to more complicated manoeuvres in the dot com world.

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Re: No words

Author: Tom Bombadil
Date: 12-19-07 04:24

Every word of what you say is so true, coyote, especially the "without expectation or complaint or regret".

Every word of what you say is so true but where did you learn to express "No words" so beautifully? It is so simple, so nostalgic, so contented, so happy.

Thank you for this warm feeling!

Merry Christmas!

(Apparently people are saying "Happy Holidays!" more and more and "Merry Christmas!" less and less and there is a movement to try to reverse the trend.)

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Re: No words

Author: Jane
Date: 12-20-07 06:53

Hello Tom, Coyote, Joy, Liao, Dr. SL Lee, Yoon-Ngan... all old friends and new ones:

Happy Holidays and a Prosperous New Year 2008 for everyone in the world!

Keep up all the good work! Coyote's words or "no words" are poetic and profound...

Life goes on and sometimes i wish i know a bit better how to plan and execute my life. ;-)

Jane

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Re: No words

Author: Joy Living
Date: 12-20-07 13:00

Jane & All,

Sometimes the best laid plans go awry, even with the utmost dedication and effort. Nothing is foolproof against rejection or ignominous failure. Nevermind, I say.

Nowadays while taking inventory of the past and future, I have decided to experiment with margaritas. Yes. Chilled margarita glasses in the fridge, rimmed with sugar, await an impromptu moment. So far - frozen blueberry margarita and mango margarita. (Oops I forgot the rum in the mango margarita ).

I celebrate & give thanks for my victories, no matter how small they are - be they clearing the yard of fall leaves, or tidying a clump of things which need sorting, mastering the recycling system, power washing the patios, an internet challenge, etc.

I have been thinking about you and wondering how you are - Laughing Jane in High Heels and Umbrella in the Rain in Busy Traffic Guangzhou.

Blessings,

Joy

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Re: No words

Author: Joy Living
Date: 12-20-07 13:02

Perhaps this is contentment.

"Contentment is the greatest wealth."

The Urantia Book,
Page 1447 (131:3.6)

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Lugu Lake

Author: Joy Living
Date: 12-20-07 13:04

Enjoyed photos of Lugu Lake, Tom, through link provided by Coyote.

Solitude. Bliss.

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Re: No words

Author: Tom Bombadil
Date: 12-23-07 06:16

Hello Jane,

Good to hear from you again.

Regards
Tom

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Re: No words

Author: coyote
Date: 01-02-08 19:27

"i wish i know a bit better how to plan and execute my life."

I am 46. I still tell myself (rather foolishly) how I am going to be this better man by moving from A to J or doing this or that. It would actually work if we could see our future, I think. We could then plan and "execute" like we were born not of mothers but of gods. But alas that is not to be. As we are, all efforts are to be commended. All failures to be eulogized. Along the way we have failed plenty, and disappointed many. But here we are, standing still, variously damaged but unbroken, hoping but also learning to contain our hopes, weak often but believing still in our own strength. We are a noble race. A species of dreamers. Desiring love, accolade, painlessness, a bit more life, is that so bad, is that so stupid of us for daring to reach out, to reach forth, to reach within? Have a good 2008, Jane. My best wishes.

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Re: Season's Greetings

Author: coyote
Date: 01-02-08 19:30

Tom. Sorry for the late reply. I simply replaced your "oo" at the end of your web address with "00" (i.e. zero zero.) Maybe easier next time to just copy the address and then paste it in the post. Regards.

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Thank you coyote

Author: Tom Bombadil
Date: 01-03-08 06:10

Thank you for the explanation, coyote. I have learnt something. As I have told Joy, my skills at the computer do not stretch beyond emails and posts. Therefore copy and paste is still in the learning process. And that also explains the length of time I take to post those photographs.

You have a very philosophical acceptance of man's fears, failures and foibles. That is good.

With regards
Tom

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Chilled Margaritas & Joy

Author: Tom Bombadil
Date: 01-03-08 06:20

Hello Joy. I missed this part re: your experimentations with chilled margaritas. Would like to hear about the outcome of your chilled margaritas and those "impromptu moments" plus the the mango flavoured one in which rum was so carelessly omitted. lol

Regards
Tom

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