Author: Ted Lee (---.dsl.lsan03.pacbell.net)
Date: 08-20-03 03:15
Yes, I don't know why but at my age (28 now), I can never love Asian and Chinese women no longer. I lot of it is psychological. I have seen too many Asian women around me with other race men too much, esp. when I was in college at UCLA. It has still stuck to my head and psyche to this day.
Of course, I have tried to outlive this fear and hate, but as my days pass on, I begin to realize that I just that have that kind of attraction to Asian and Chinese women no more. Of course, this would upset my parents in a way because their generations in America were taught to only marry other Chinese-Americans, Chinese from China or any other Asians. You see, I was not really raised around a lot of Asians and Chinese-Americans. I grew up among mostly Hispanic and Middle Eastern people.
Now, I am only thinking of Hispanic, Middle Eastern, and white women. Yes, I admit it. I don't think I will grow out of this mindset.
At this point in my life, I am just looking for someone and love.
I still see that it is harder for a young Asian man to be picky and choosy in mate selection in America. Yet, I dont' give up. I am still pursuing the women and at the same time I would like to know if mail order bride service in Mexico and the former Soviet Union is worthwhile and trustable?
I like Mexican women because they are not very upward seeking and very family oriented. I like them because they are comfortable with their femininity and being around children. Of course, they are beautiful too.
I am also very attracted to Soviet and Middle Eastern women. They are educated and I have always had the best conversations with these women. They are not as fast-paced as American and Western women. They are beautiful, but they also have our same Eastern moral and attitudes in many ways.
I am not trying to make a social statement to the society I live in, but when young Asian men see everyone else mixing with each other and yet we are not allowed in this process or go through major stumbling blocks, it really makes us angry and want to get the same kind of love and attention from all races of women. We just want to have the same chances as everyone else.
I don't want to feel inferior no more.
And, I want to find the special love of my life. I still feel proud to be Asian and Chinese, but love is a different circumstance. I hope people understand the unique situation many of the young Asian men in USA go through always.
I am too old to lash out and be angry. Many nights I scold and curse the white man in front of my mirror before going to bed or early in the morning. I am tired of that now. I just want the love that I deserve to have. God knows. And, if given the chance, I can prove that we Asian and Chinese men are capable of giving much love too.
If I am not finding any luck soon, I really want to look at the mail order bride thing.
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